I used to be against gay marriage. Flatly against it. Probably because I thought it was weird, but that was a few years ago. Then I began the evolution toward my current opinion on the matter. It started when I heard stories about longtime same sex partners and I thought, Aw, how cute they love each other just like real married couples. I started thinking that maybe they should be allowed to be acknowledged in some way, but not marriage, definitely not marriage, maybe some kind of domestic partnership. But why not marriage? This is the one that took the most consideration on my part. The domestic partnership, I felt should include all the benefits of marriage, all the same rights and acknowledgments, but why then, should they not be allowed to marry?
What I realized about myself, I didn't much like. I realized that the reason was because I was holding onto an archaic, bigoted notion that because gay relationships were a little odd to me, that if they were acknowledged as married in the traditional sense, it somehow cheapened or threatened my marriage. I'm almost ashamed to admit that I felt that way, but it's true. Then I came upon my epiphany, the only ones who can cheapen or threaten my marriage are my husband and I. It's our relationship, no one else's and we are responsible for how strong it is and the amount of meaning it has. It was ridiculously selfish of me to try and deny gay couples striving for the same depth of commitment because what they do in their bedrooms creeps me out a bit.
Hi JJ! UJ here, catching up on your posts. I understand your growth process here, but my take on it is a little different.
ReplyDeleteI had the honor of giving away one of the brides about 10 years ago in a Wiccan/Shaman wedding in the NM mountains. I have given away quite a few brides over the years, and this was probably the most beautiful ceremony I've ever been in. (except for the skyclad one...) I was the only guy within 10 miles, but nobody made me feel unwelcome or unloved. They did make me feel lit after all the champagne, but thats another story.
The point is, they were and are married. To insist that it does not exist until the government agrees that it does just makes us more sheeple. The marriage is between them and their God(s). It is not the business of government to say either way.
Meh, actually I have to say usually, or traditionally if you wish, government is more apart of marriage down through the ages than religion or at least organized religion.
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